Hopeless Romantic

So I met a guy.

I bet you are all thinking, big woop, nobody cares, but this is a huge deal for me after everything I have been through.

After my best friend/ex-boyfriend cheated on me, I was set on not dating for a long time and certainly not letting myself become vulnerable enough to get hurt. While I am not doing the later part, I am attempting the dating game. I have been seeing guys here and there but that was more like me using them for free drinks and sex, and dropping them when they started to like me. I know, I sound like a complete bitchy skank. But after feeling the pain that I felt, could you really blame me for how I was treating myself and the men who mistakenly wanted to take me out?

I’m not going to lie, I love sex. A lot. But it got old after a while. I was longing for cuddling and dates and someone making me feel special. Emotional intimacy is just as important as physical. I am normally a relationship person but after everything that I have been through, I was avoiding all emotions. But then I went on a date with this dude. His name is Pat and he is a ninth-grade history teacher. At first I really wasn’t feeling him. It took me a while to warm him up a bit. He was on his best behavior while I was on the other side of the table talking like a sailor. At the end of the date, he held my hand and kissed me goodbye. I don’t know many men that have the balls to hold a girl’s hand on the first date. I liked it.

I gave him a chance and saw him again and he was finally being himself. He is so nice to me and incredibly smart. He is just the kind of man that does all the things a girl dreams of. Random massages, forehead kisses, breakfast in the morning and goes out of his way to make you smile.

I thought that type of man didn’t exist other than my father, who  is amazing to my mother. So needless to say, it scared the fucking shit out of me. I was just waiting for him to ghost me, or tell me he hides dead bodies in his walls or something!

But nope. He is just a good and genuine man who likes to spoil his woman. And I guess that sorta happens to be me now. I need to take it slow, so we are still just casually dating right now, but it doesn’t feel like we have only known each other for a short amount of time.

Okay okay, I’ll stop gushing about this boy I like!

But the experience has been so eye-opening for me. Having him plan to see me and doing things that he knows I like, makes me look back at all the men that took me for granted and wonder why the hell did I ever let them treat me like I was nothing.

Now and days, I think that women settle for the love that they think they deserve (Yes I know that is a quote from Perks of Being a Wallflower) and most of them have low self-worth or self-esteem. We should be treated with all the respect and love that we give to our significant other. It doesn’t matter what your sexual orientation is, but relationships can’t be one-sided.

I love, love and I am excited to see where this one goes!


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